What should I do...

I haven't gone to the gym for months now.
I should start going again.

I haven't started writing my 'Travelog di Bumi Sakura'.
I should start writing it.

I haven't visited the list of possible kindergartens/Taski for Huzaifah
I should start visiting.

I need to strenghten threads of relationships to become ropes
I should start working on them.

I feel like I might be happier if I could contribute positively to another's life
But unlike when I was a Malaysian-MA-student-cum-an-Imam's-wife in Tokyo,
I am not quite sure how to play my current role effectively to achieve that.

I know I should start making changes.
Can anyone tell me where to start?

All pink - part 2

All pink in the office

"So you wore pink - what difference does it make to a breast cancer sufferer? Wearing pink without putting in effort or contributing towards cancer research or as such, is simply meaningless..."

Someone uttered in a tone laced with disdain.

Ok, granted, I've never contributed financially towards breast cancer research.
And to my limited knowledge, no one in my family had suffered from breast cancer.
And that day when the whole sector wore pink, nobody suggested for us to make financial contribution towards cancer research.
But others from different sectors noticed us wearing pink and asked us why.
That to me, was our small contribution towards raising awareness of breast cancer.
It shows, in a small way, (perhaps insignificant to some) that we care.


Personally, I don't pass by the red cooking oil, Carotino in the supermarket aisle without remembering Auntie Umi, my friend Aidil's mother. It came as a big surprise when we first learned about Auntie Umi's illness. She breastfed all 4 children, no one in her family had been diagnosed with cancer before, she was an active person and pretty much lived and ate healthily. Proof that it could happen to anyone - regardless of what the doctors list as risk factors.

What I do remember about her -
She fought hard, but she did not became all hard and bitter in her fight.
She cried, but she also smiled, putting up a brave front so that others would not cry for her.
She must had gone through lot of pain, but I remember her jovial self more .
In her quiet tone when she answered questions about her pain , I could sense her strong determination to fight, fight, fight until the last drop.
She made a lot of changes in her diet and her lifestyle - Carotino and plenty of soy milk forming part of it.

I did not have the opportunity to visit her when her condition must had deteriorated towards the end of her life, but I'm sure that she must had gone in peace.
There was a lot of strength shown by someone who could accept her condition, fought hard yet still counted her blessings and at peace with herself.


So, yes, perhaps wearing pink might constitute a small, insignificant thing to do, when many are fighting the cancer and others are taking care of their loved ones who had been diagnosed with this cancer.
Still, the main intention is to show our support and letting those who are suffering to know that they are not alone, that people actually do care, and that some of them (like Auntie Umi to me) are in our heart, thoughts and prayers.

1 sektor 1 ingatan

"My Only Wish"

A poem read by an 8 year old boy at Criminalise War International Conference & Exhibition, Kuala Lumpur, 28 September 2009

My Only Wish

All your armies

All your fighters

All your tanks

And all your soldiers

Against a boy

Holding a stone

Standing there, all alone

In his eyes, I see the sun

In his smile, I see the moon

And I wonder, I only wonder

Who is weak, and who is strong?

Who is right, and who is wrong?

And I wish, I only wish

That the truth, has begun

* Picture taken from here

Rampai Raya 1430H - the pics

Some pictures taken during Raya season
Yes, I know, yet another belated post...
Still, late is better than never, kan?

Raya morning - when Humaidi went cranky and refused to stand still

Taken when Humaidi was calmer but apparently the baton had been passed over to Huzaifah. Well, looks like it's going to be some years before we can take 'proper' family Raya photo...

Raya afternoon - when the kids' baju melayu went all smeared with don't-know-whats

(taken during a short interval at MIL's place before we continued visiting others)

Hubby had a change of clothes too, because otherwise people keep mistaken his nephews and niece as his

(baju sama warna)

Ayah really enjoyed his newly found long-lost-favorite nasi kandar - licin pinggan, with my brother Amirul in a finger lickin' good pose.

Part of the Hj Hassan clan in a kopitiam in Penang

My brother Azrul, SIL Sarah (who was then heavily pregnant with baby Balqis) & Uwais

Baby Haniyya

Huzaifah and Humaidi watching TV

For some reason, I found the mock 'tie' that comes with Humaidi's/Haniyya's shirt to be quite cute

Chik Ma, Pak Chik, Ayah Tam and Mak Tam sharing a light moment during breakfast

The Hj Hassan clan basically 'conquered' all the tables next to the pool during breakfast.

Seen here: Teh, Atiqah, Ayah Lang - with Firdhaus and Eda in the background

Nyah, Ijan, Ain, Iman, Mak and Syahril

Among the male cousins

Huzaifah and Humaidi had a gall time in the swimming pool

Huzaifah especially loves basking in the sun and playing with the white beach sand

The 3 families reunion at Che Lee's place in Taman PKNK, Alor Setar

All Pink - Breast Cancer Awareness

SMS from the sectoral boss' Personal Assisstant last night read as:

"Dear Sir/Madam,
We in the sector have agreed to wear pink tomorrow to raise awareness of the Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Join us?"

Pink for the ladies is no big deal, yet for the guys could be quite a problem. Oh well, at least chances are, none of them would be suspended for wearing pink at work.

In the sectoral esprit de corp, I put on a pair of pink baju kurung. Not a big deal for me - I have two pairs of pink baju kurung. Although I'm not a fan of pink, I've been told that I look better in pink compared to more earthy tones which I preferred. Ehcheh.

Anyway - the main point is to raise awareness for Breast Cancer, and I think that's a noble cause worthy of support especially among the ladies. Turned out - four male officers wear pink today, with one wearing red striped shirt and yet another puts on a red tie since they have neither pink shirts nor pink ties. Well, I supposed that could still be considered as in support of the "let's wear pink" campaign. An elder officer joked that the nearest-to-pink piece of garment he owns is a pair of brief, but surely no one cares to see him wearing his brief in Superman style (urghhhh, nooooo...)

Anyway, why bother asking everyone's support? Well, according to the American Cancer Society, roughly 1,720 men will be diagnosed with breast cancer in 2009. It might not affect the men as much as women but still, Breast Cancer affects everyone.

#####

* Risk factors of Breast Cancer

• Personal history: A woman who had breast cancer in one breast has an increased risk of getting cancer in her other breast.
• Family history: A woman's risk of breast cancer is higher if her mother, sister, or daughter had breast cancer. The risk is higher if her family member got breast cancer before age 40. Having other relatives with breast cancer (in either her mother's or father's family) may also increase a woman's risk.
• Certain changes: Some women have cells in the breast that look abnormal under a microscope. Having certain types of abnormal cells (atypical hyperplasia and lobular carcinoma in situ [LCIS]) increases the risk of breast cancer.
• Race: Breast cancer is diagnosed more often in Caucasian women than others
• Inactivity: Women who are physically inactive throughout life may have an increased risk of breast cancer. Being active may help decrease risk.

Easy steps to help curtail one's chances of getting breast cancer:

1. Stay at ideal weight
2. Exercise. As little as 30 minutes a day will help.
3. Follow a healthy diet, eat right.
4. No smoking.
5. Go for timely health check-ups; early detection is the best defense.

* (Source: Wikipedia)

P/S: While it's quite late in the month, I'll keep this pink template until the end of this month, insya Allah

Tragedi Oktober

Some stuff that happened in October...

• The ceiling fan in Mak's house went on fire one Sunday night.
• A thief forced an entry into MIL's house in Rasah.
• My biological mother broke her knee when she stumbled over a child bar meant for my half-brother's child at the toilet.

1. That night we were in Kampung Tunku. Hubby and I were both exhausted and planned on returning to Putrajaya after a nap. Next thing we knew, our helper was yelling "Pak Ustaz! Kakak! Api! Api!" Quickly woke hubby up and went down. The ceiling fan in the living hall glowed with fire as some flames dropped and crackled on the carpet beneath it.

"Air! (Water) Air!" Ayah shouted in the otherwise dark house, as Ayah had already shut the main electricity switch off. "Bawak anak-anak keluar! Keluar!" he ordered my helper

The house had partially burnt down due to a fire caused by electrical short circuit in 1987. Seeing the ceiling fan on fire caused a small chaos for a while.

Someone collected water in buckets (in the dark) and hubby was the one strong enough to hurl the water high enough to reach the high ceiling fan. I remember helping removing the carpet from beneath the blazing ceiling fan which had started dripping too.

I asked Mak who has called 999, but in the confusion everybody seemed to forget to bring our handphone. I quickly went up and groped for my handphone on the bed, found it and quickly went down. By then the fire had already been extinguished, so it was no longer necessary to call the fire engine.

"Call TNB," Mak (or was it Ayah?) instructed. I tried called the directory assistance number and asked for TNB emergency number. Was asked to call 15454, the 24/7 TNB Careline number. Could not call 15454 on my U Mobile phone, so switched to Mak's Celcom line. (In the chaos, Ayah's phone somehow got wet and could not be used) and succeeded in getting to TNB.

TNB was aware that something was wrong with the electricity supply in our house. Just when I uttered "No 8..." the guy on the line quickly finished reading out the house address. Hmm, impressive... He wanted to confirm to location of "Kampung Tunku" (in Petaling Jaya) and said that some TNB guys would be with us soon.

"Soon" turned out to be 40-50 minutes. Two guys, Siva and Ramesh, came and checked on the electricity main switch, reprimanded us for extinguishing the fire using water (as it could conduct electricity and cause electrical shock when the water reached the floor) and assured us that it was okay for us to switch on lights and all again.

While we had learned about water being electric conductor ages ago, and Ayah actually has a proper fire extinguisher in his room, none of us remembered these two facts when we first realized that the ceiling fan was on fire. (Yeah, blame it on being panic.)

No wonder there was a strong burning smell since early evening but we could not track its origin. According to my helper, at around 11 p.m., when the other helper (my brother's who later on ran away) started switching off the lights in the ground floor, the fan suddenly started moving. My helper asked the other helper if she had switched on the ceiling fan, to which she adamantly replied no. And then the ceiling fan started to emit some orangish lights, followed by some crackles, and whoosh - it was on fire!

To be continued

Rampai Raya 1429H - part 3

26. The highlight of the Hj Hassan clan gathering - BBQ night. At RM35 per pax, it was quite a feast. However, hubby had a headache and our helper wanted to stay with baby Haniyya in the room with Ayah Tam's helper, so I could not enjoy the food thorough and thorough. Not when I had to ensure that Huzaifah and Humaidi would not dive into the tempting swimming pool.

27. I had not a single photo of the BBQ night.

28. And it was not fun when hubby did not came down to join the BBQ at all. Hence he did not join the big family photo session. Really felt a bit awkward being in the family photo shoot without my hubby beside me.

29. Although I repeatedly told my aunts that it's hubby's normal reaction to sleep off his headache, my cousin Atiqah and Syifa' were both reprimanded by their respective mother for 'causing trouble for me with my husband'. (Interestingly, both aunt are also married to Ustaz)

30. One aunt in fact told me that I should cut down on all-girl's day out or lunch, when I told her that normally hubby has no problem allowing me to go for all-girl's day out.

31. Happened that on that particular day hubby was not too happy with me taking ages to get back to the hotel (because he had to take care of the kids. Our helper mistakenly thought that I was back with him so she sent the toddlers to our room and hubby found it difficult to handle the kids on his own)

32. The reason it took so long for me to get back? Massive traffic jam from Queensbay mall to Tanjung Tokong due to heavy rain. Our journey to Queensbay Mall lasted for about 30 minutes but the return journey took more than an hour. Good thing there were some DVDs on board, so the girls watched "Aliens in the Attic" while I struggled in the traffic jam.

33. However, I don't think just because I was late once I should be penalized from having any all-girl's day out ever. Truth is, I seldom have any and seldom get to have lunch with girlfriends too. Everybody is always so busy and so occupied that it's difficult to organize even one all-girls's day out. And sometimes, when a friend finally get to organize it, I could not make it due to other commitments.

34. Anyway, we had a better day the next day. Visited Ummi in Sungai Petani, had a reunion of sort in Alor Setar and spent the night in Pendang.

35. It was great meeting both Che Lee's family and Pokcik's family in Alor Setar. When Che Lee and Kak Ita found out that we were in Penang and going to visit my biological mother in Sungai Petani, they quickly invited us over to their home in Taman PKNK, Alor Setar. "Take the Alor Setar Utara exit and I'll meet you there," or so Che Lee promised.

36. True to his word, he did met us up at the highway exit, but after being held up in another place because his other guest confused a building in Taman PKNK with Wisma PKNK or something. No worry, we assured him. We were happy just being able to meet up with him and family.

37. And his other guests were no stranger to us - it's Pokcik Nasa and his family. While hubby and I had met up with Pokcik since we came back from Japan, we hadn't had a chance to meet up with Kak Mai and his kids, and it's been two years since we last met up.

38. As for Che Lee, Kak Ita and kids, they'd just came back for good in April 2009 and we haven't meet up since a year ago.

39. Kak Ita made us really delicious laksa. She said sorry for the famous laksa teluk kechai stall was not opened on that day or otherwise we could have a taste of the famous delicious laksa. But really, after almost a week of ketupat, lemang, rendang and stuff, her "laksa Taman PKNK" tasted like heaven.

40. The kids had really grown up so quickly. No wonder last time Ayah's relatives used to say "dah besar dah ye" everytime they visit my grandparents' place. I had the urge to say exactly the same thing to my friends' kids. The one thing that held me back was the thought that crossed my mind when I was greeted with such comment "Laa, it goes without saying that kids grow up. You don't expect them to grow smaller, right?"

41. I was especially impressed with Nazhan Ariq, Pokcik's youngest. Barely 3 years old and already he handles his dad's expensive DSLR Nikon camera expertly. "That's his toy," Kak Mai quipped. Hah, my guess is he is a chip off the old block in making, inheriting Pokcik's creativity and productivity when it comes to photography.

42. True to their adventurous nature, Huzaifah and Humaidi raised a small ruckus in Che Lee's house. Good thing that Che Lee kids have some stuff that could distract the smaller ones for a while - they keep some hamsters. Fascinated by the 'tikus' that he saw then, for a while Huzaifah keeps asking to watch the 'tikus' also known as "G-Force" DVD in the car.

43. "Yeay!" comment heard during raya: "You looked thinner" (from someone who hadn't seen me in a few month)
"Ouch!" comment heard during raya: "Nampak dah bertambah (berat) noo" (from someone who hadn't seen me in a year)
Truth: I'd shed about 2 kg during fasting month and gained about 600 gm since Raya.

44. Spent the night at hubby's friend, Ustaz Ghazali's house in Pendang. He had some trouble regarding change of scheme under the old SSB to SSM (he deserved to be graded as DGA29 but was graded as DGA27) Helped him out a bit some months ago and he told us that if everything goes well, he had been told by the state education office that he'll be getting his long overdue extra pay soon and he might get a time-based promotion too, insya Allah.

45. The next day was not a great day for us though. Huzaifah had an asthma attack. First took him to a clinic - and it was hard finding a clinic opened on Friday, the day off in Kedah. A patient in the clinic recommneded us to take him to the Klinik Kesihatan Pendang.

46. Took him to Klinik Kesihatan Pendang, but the government clinic was closed. No one manned the "Emergency" area. Went back to the private clinic, this time we waited patiently for our turn to be called in by the doctor. And told by the doctor that due to the seriousness of Huzaifah's condition, we had to take him to the hospital in Alor Setar.

47. So we drove all the way back to Alor Setar, to Hospital Sultanah Bahiyah. A real efficient hospital - Huzaifah got his nebulizer treatment in no time at all. In fact, right after he got his share of 'gas', he started wandering all around the A&E unit while I had to wait for my turn to see the doctor.

48. Well, turned out that every morning, my eyes went all itchy, really, really red (like those owned by ghosts/demons in Hong Kong movies), the lids went all swollen, with lots of tears and yellowish goops (or locally known as "taik mata") that at times seemed to stick the lids together, especially after sleeping. The doctor confirmed that I'd gotten eye infection and issued an MC for four days.

49. I got flu too and got a one-day MC after the first ended. The week after Raya week, I only went to the office once. I took two more days off - because my eyes were still red and swollen and I did not want to cause infection in the office yet I was not keen to spend another long day in the government clinic to get another MC issued.

50. But after all is said and done - it was a good Raya, alhamdulillah. One must never forget the blessings showered by Allah in so many forms and guises - family, friends, good health, laughter and all. Alhamdulillah.

Rampai Raya 1430H - part 2

16. The Hj Hassan (my late Tok Ayah) clan had a family gathering in Naza Hotel Penang sponsored by Kumpulan Sakata Berhad, a company owned and managed by children of Hj Hassan. There we were - 8 children (and spouses), 36 grandchildren (minus some who are studying overseas plus some with spouses) and 5 (and 1/2) great grandchildren, in a gathering that was held for the first time in a hotel.

17. We spent two nights in the hotel - 2 suites, 8 deluxe and 6 standard rooms. And yes, often my cousins 'conquered' the lobby area, playing congkak, chess and other board games. The grandchildren age ranges from 30's to one year, so the majority are tweens and teenagers, and one can just imagine how 'meriah' the hotel was being filled up with the Hj Hassan clan.

18. Since it was the first time for us to have such gathering, there was no itinerary planned out. No sports matches or sukaneka activities or as such. Next time, maybe?

19. Next time hopefully it will not be held in Naza Hotel again. Service was terrible. My brother told me that his room was not made up even once throughout the stay. Some of my aunts and uncles who arrived at about 2.00 p.m. which is the standard hour for checking-in had to wait until 5.30 p.m. to check in because they were told that there was only one person who was on duty to make up rooms in the whole hotel.

20. On the second day, we were told by the reception desk that some occupants in deluxe rooms may had to move to standard rooms because our reservation was only for 2D1N and not 3D1N. My youngest brother who was in charge of the reservation said he asked for "two days", the hotel misunderstood it as staying for 2D1N which translated into common man's language as "one night" where else my Adik meant "two nights". We were told that some reservations for deluxe rooms had been completed and that mean the seniors (those who occupied the deluxe rooms) had to move. Not sure how my uncle Ayah Tam sorted it out with the hotel management - but in the end none of the Hj Hassan clan had to move to other rooms. My guess is that the hotel had to refund those who made reservation for deluxe rooms but had to be placed in standard rooms...

21. Ayah had a field day finding an old favorite nasi kandar stall was back in business. Previously he went to that particular kopitiam only to find out that the old nasi kandar operator had stopped operating there.

22. Hubby had a field day snapping photos in Padang Kota area

23. I had a field day went outing with four female cousins - Firdhaus, Atiqah and Syifa'. Wanted to ask our cousin Syahril's wife Ain to join us but when we knocked on her door there was no answer.

24. It's amazing what my younger cousins could remember about the crushes (and the crushed ones) I used to have. Atiqah actually remembered that not only I used to have kuih raya sent to the office but one guy in particular actually sent some batang buruk (my favorite kuih raya) to my home in person - with the younger cousins watching/spying behind the front door that caused him to blush. Ha ha.

25. We wanted to visit Masni's family in Bayan Baru. Attempted once to drive from Tanjung Tokong to Bayan Baru at night but ended up back in square one after almost an hour of driving. However, the next day we ended up going to Queensbay Mall - which is not that far from Bayan Baru - in no time at all. Yeah, blame the poor signage in Penang, hi hi.

To be continued

Rampai Raya 1430H

It had been a busy month, and a rather stressful one, hence my posting the Raya entry long after it ended.

In 2007, we spent our last Raya in Nihon, so friends and family in Malaysia urged me to do a lengthy report on it.
In 2008, we returned to Malaysia during Ramadhan and spent our first-after-3-Raya's-in-Nihon in Malaysia, so friends and almost-family in Nihon wondered how it went, urging me to at least make do with an update.
This year, there was no real sense of urgency to report.
Still, all in all, it was a good Raya, especially in terms of get-togethers...

1. We went back to Kampung Tunku the night before Raya eve. My helper thought that we would drop her at her friend's place that night but it was really late so we brought her back to Mak's place. She insisted on being given a day off on Raya or "kalau tidak, aku mau berenti". Yeah, I was threatened by my own bibik on Raya eve, although I already told her that she could take three days later on. Not wanting to make a big issue of it, we gave her 3 days (plus half day on day 4) off for Raya.

2. Raya eve was spent cooking in Mak's kitchen - Mak cooked some traditional Raya dishes such as kuah kacang, kuah lodeh, nasi himpit and rendang ayam while I cooked Thai style daging masak merah and daging pipi rebus.

3. Mak said that there would be no takbir group visiting us on malam Raya to which I agreed. We used to have the takbir group visiting us before - back when I was still single. Now with four kids in the house - and boisterous ones too - not having a takbir group coming over seems like a safer option for now...

4. Ayah was still undecided about inviting the takbir group to the house even until after Maghrib, causing SIL Sarah and I to be in a dilemma - whether or not to prepare some tea and snacks for the takbir group. But alas - Mak won. Yeay!

5. Baby Haniyya went to sleep at about 11 p.m., giving hubby and I an opportunity to sneak out of the house while Huzaifah and Humaidi were engrossed with "Thomas the tank engine and Friends" upstairs. Destination? Jalan TAR.

6. If one does not mind the crowd, the noises and the inconvenience of quite-a-distance parking-and-walking, shopping at Jalan TAR on malam Raya could be quite an experience. We learned our lesson from last year not to drive anywhere near Jalan TAR itself, so we (illegally) parked our car at Jalan Raja Laut. We had to walk quite a distance, but beats being stuck in traffic jam for hours (like what happened last year)

7. We already bought our baju raya but not much kuih raya so main mission that night was to buy kuih raya. But since there were plenty of bargains, our final haul included a lot of unplanned purchases too. Yes, I blamed the gila-gila bargain.

8. Seriously, where else on KL could one get ready-made Baju Kurung for RM25 a pair? Or 3 tudungs with soft awning for RM 10? Or a look-like-feel-like-but-not-real songket samping for RM20? And almond london cookies which normally cost RM15 - RM18 for just RM10 a tray?

9. When we finally returned to Kampung Tunku, it was around 3.00 a.m. But the sale was still going strong, making me wonder when did the malam Raya sale stop?

10. Since hubby had agreed to lead Solat Raya in Masjid Rasah, we had to return to Seremban that very night/early morning. Our journey back to Rasah began at about 4.00 a.m., and we reached our destination at almost 5.00 a.m. Hubby had to stop by the road side because he was so sleepy that I had to drive the last quarter of the journey.

11. 1st day of Raya, we visited 9 houses. Considering we once visited 11 houses in one day, that was not so bad. Hubby's family is a really big one. MIL's siblings - from various mothers - amount to almost 40. So there.

12. Our family theme this year? Turquoise. My ready made baju kurung is not really turquoise, more towards light blue - but it seemed to match well with baju melayu worn by hubby and the boys. No baju melayu for Baby Haniyya though but he did not look too bad in light blue baby suit.
13. There seemed to be an awfully lot of families choosing light blue/turquoise as their baju raya theme this year though. We met with at least one or two families donning the same color at almost every house we visited.

14. Hubby's younger brother's kids wore turquoise on Raya too but the parents wore purple, causing some confusion about the kids' parents. Ha ha.

15. I got a long distance phone call all the way from Swiss. It was so good hearing Ju's voice. The line was not really clear, but still it was a delightful surprise. Ju would probably said I did the same thing to her when I was in Japan but still, I was touched. That was so sweet and I love you so much Ju!

To be continued

08101970

When I read this, I suddenly remembered why earlier on I kept asking myself that there was something significant with October 8th, but what was it?

Back when we were students in residential school, we used to keep our mugs/tumblers along the wall of the dining hall. When I was in Form 4 or 5, when girls my age were nuts about Jason Priestley, Luke Perry, Leonardo Di Caprio etc and one can find their names inscribed on many mug/tumblers (along with all the hearts, stars, flowers...), inscribed on my tumbler was

08101970
Hizairi

Yeah, I know, I was different that way.

Chances were girls in my form would know that I was nuts about Hizairi Othman's writing. They would tell me everytime they saw his writing appeared in Dewan Siswa, Fokus or in daily newspapers etc.

I used to write to him, commenting on his writing, in English, addressing him as Sir.
I can't actually remember what drove me to do so, but my guess was I wanted to be rather different compared to other fan letters he received.

I can't remember when I first started writing to him, but it was not until 1995 when I got his reply.
In that one typed page (in 1995, a typed page is not as common as it is today - it showed effort), he told me that he used to reply to all letters so as not to be labelled "sombong". But as time goes on and he got more girls writing "to learn writing" or "to get to know him better" or even to ask him to be their "abang angkat", he stopped responding.

But there was something different about my letters. All of them were written in English, with none inserting the "to learn writing"/"want to get to know him better"/offer to be "adik angkat". He admitted that he likes receiving my comments and that I was among a selected few of his favorite followers.

It wasn't until a year later when I first met him in person.
I just finished reading his "Spesimen β" when I learned that he was going to give a talk in Shah Alam. At that time, I'd just finished my A-Levels and was waiting to be called to NCUK so I had plenty of 'free time'. I decided to write my comments about "Spesimen β" and hand the letter in person to him.

I was the only one other than the teachers to appear in that particular school hall on that day who was not in school uniform, so the organizer invited me to meet up with Hizairi after he was done with giving his motivational talk. I took that opportunity to personally deliver the letter to him.

He looked at the envelope once and immediately looked up at me,
"Eh, you Azra ye? Azra Haida?"

I was speechless.
Simultaneously honored and humbled to realize that my favorite writer actually recognized my handwriting.

And from then on, the "fan-favorite writer" relationship gradually shifted to being friends.

We sent Raya card to each other. He would sent me copy of his writing when I told him I could not get my hand on them when I was in Leeds. Even when he won Formula Malaysia competition with "Bulan di Puncak Notre Dame", I found it difficult to find the story, so he made a copy of them and asked me to collect it at his pigeon hole in UPM. Back then, he was working as a tutor in UPM and my office was not that far from there. (Mak was on the interview panel when he applied for the post in UPM, and Mak told me that she could not understand why I was so fascinated with him and his writing - he was "biasa saja" as Mak put it, hehehe)

He came to my office once to collect his own birthday present. I remember buying him one dark blue kain pelikat and upon receiving it, he told me that he was just thinking of buying a new kain pelikat and it was just as if I could read his mind. Heh, he could be a smooth talker sometimes. But yes he could be really charming and it was not difficult to understand why he used to have so many fans 'wanting to know him better'.

Happy birthday Hizairi where ever you are. If your mother's hunch is right - that you are still alive and safe somewhere - my doa is that you will be under Allah's protection and in His guided path always.

First girl in the family...

My SIL just gave birth to their second child this morning at 1.03 a.m.
The girl, Balqis Raihana is just a year and a month apart from her elder brother, Uwais Sharif Al-Qarni.
My brother Azrul was born on 1 July.
His son Uwais on 1 September.
And now his daughter on 1 October.
I 'complimented' Sarah, my SIL, on the 'nice timing' of the birth, to which Sarah replied, "Abang yang harap sangat baby lahir masa 1 haribulan. Doa dia termakbul la tu..."

Yes, I know I should be posting an entry on Raya.
But welcoming my first niece/Mak & Ayah's first grand daughter (after four grand sons) is a big deal which takes priority over the belated Raya entry.

Ahlan wasahlan wa marhaban ya Balqis Raihana...

P.S: Al-fatihah for the earth quake victims in Padang.